Hats

HATS by Rachelle Phipps

When you see me in town, then hear about things I do at home, well, it creates a lot of mystery. I kill opossums under my chicken coop one day, holding them up for the world to see on Facebook, and then show up in heels and skinny jeans the next. I'm really not who I seem to be, because I have to wear a lot of hats. I'm wearing the hat of an army wife and have been for over a decade, so I have to be resourceful and resilient and forgiving and sexy (more on that later) all at the same time. I say sexy, because that's how I maintain my sanity and it's a survival mechanism for feeling like I have it all together (plus I believe we should be good-looking for our men -more on that later). The more I look put-together and fashionable, the more you can bet, that it has been a stressful day and I honestly took 18 minutes to do something for myself, for once... As an army wife, my other survival mechanism is ferociously cleaning two days prior to my husband leaving and for a week after he leaves. I've come to realize it's the only thing I feel I have control over in this lifestyle.


I wear the hat of a veteran homeschooling mom and that one is quite puzzling. I'm never sure exactly how I feel about it because some days are amazing and grace-filled and perfect, and some days it feels like a Wild West show in which I created the performers. It's worth it though, especially on the days that I internalize the fact that my five kids are learning more than just academics, but life skills, ability to interact with any age, and a great work ethic (yes, I know they can learn those things in public school too, but let me just have this moment). Mostly, I'm just happy that I get to spend my whole day with them. Honest truth. ‪#‎phippsfamilyhomeschool‬



Speaking of the five children (and maybe more in the future), that's my other hat. I wear the hat of mom to a tribe of quirky kids who detest the questions I get from strangers: "don't you know how that happens?" or the questions they get from strangers: "Is that your sister or your mom?", (speaking of me) and "Why aren't you at school?" I like this hat though; I always wanted 6 or 8 kids and God's been good to us. Being a mom is fantastic work and I can honestly say I love every moment of it. Really. I was only supposed to be the mom of three but now I get to be the mom of five so I cherish every part...every season...every day. ‪#‎soblessed‬


My other hat should be labeled "network marketing enthusiast", because seriously, I wish I could join them all! I dabbled around in two network marketing companies before I found "my people" and "my thang". Yes I said thang, not thing...a thing is something you just do because you have to...a thang is something you're passionate about and good at. So I do my thang and love every minute of it. It's not going away any time soon!! ‪#‎plexusforlife‬
Another hat I wear is "small farm owner" but the farm seems really big when I'm trying to take care of it by myself. This is the hat covered in grass from weed-eating, dirt from gardening, and horse hair from riding bareback on the mare that I've owned since I was 10...I don't like to ride other horses; just her. The kids and I sell chicken and duck eggs on Sunday. Chickens have always been a passion of mine but owning ducks has turned out to be my niche so the "duck-girl" hat isn't getting discarded any time soon, either. There's too much to mention with this farm-woman hat. It encompasses my life...hence the reason I feel the need to dress up, even to church and Awana, or the grocery store. I'm a hillbilly bum, the rest of the time, so that's my only time to feel like a lady! ‪#‎hillbillycharm‬ ‪#‎kybluegrassgirl‬ ‪#‎thatduckgirl‬



One hat that confuses the hell out of me is my "Lover" hat. I'm a wife to someone who is incompatible with me but completes me in every way. Later you'll hear about a hat that is the epitome of antithesis (you know...the opposite of what you would think) and this one is like that hat, except I call it the epitome of contradiction. Everything I am that is good and worthwhile is not what he is. Everything in me that I am terrible or useless at, he excels at. Everything in him that is wonderful and true and pure, I am not even close to being. Everything in him that is undesirable, and worthless, I have an easier time with. Marriage was not created to make you happy. It was created to make you holy and IT WILL, IF YOU LET IT. The marriage hat is the hat I could pull my hair out along with, but I don't. To me, the marriage hat is as serious as the next one I'll be talking about. The commitment hat is what this marriage hat should be called...not always...but always when it can be. It should be sexy too, when it can be. Not always, but when it can be. Not when you're pushing an 8-pound human being into the world, but all other times. Sexy and committed. That's what I try to be. I think those two things will have you covered. You're not going anywhere and you look amazing where you're not going. Done deal. I need a hashtag for this area of my life...how about ‪#‎sexyandstaying‬ Cooking is important too, but I learned the hard way that it's not the most important. Sexy while cooking is snazzy though. Just don't fry bacon naked.



Besides all that I've mentioned and the ones I don't have time to mention, like: sister to three amazing people...friend to many (though I seriously suck at this one)... lover of all things Dwight Yoakam (most of my life- goals revolve around something to do with Dwight ‪#‎timedontmattertome‬ or the TV show LOST)...daughter of two fine people... hater of Pinterest (seriously, I hate Pinterest)... housekeeper (if you know me, this is one thing I do excel at...if nothing else...at least I've succeeded at the cleanliness-is-next-to-godliness thang-->notice I said Thang) ...amateur writer who struggles with security, competency, and capability issues, not to mention...finding the time to write and avoiding dangling modifiers (I definitely had to edit one sentence up there that sounded like I was selling chicken and duck eggs along with my children)...and many other hats that aren't worth listing, my last hat is who I really am under all the fluff. It's the hat that really defines me. I don't think many people know who they really are. They don't know the hat that really defines them. But I do. It's holey, its worn, its the opposite of everything you think it should be, it's been with me since I was 19 and selfish and proud and mean-turned-redeemed. It has stuck with me when I was self-righteous and judgemental and when I didn't deserve to wear it. It hung topsy-turvey, holding on by a thread, when I was heart-broken and desperate for real love and acceptance. When everything else was stripped from me, and I had nothing left to cover the humiliation and nakedness of a raw heart, I wore it because it was all I had left to wear. Even when I had to pin it, to keep it in place, this hat convinced me to keep it on; that it was worth it. When I went through circumstances that would cause most to throw this hat in the air and high-tail it outta there, this hat promised me it would never forsake me, so I didn't forsake it. This hat has seen nights of depression and desperate fighting down in the muck, for my place and purpose...valleys of disappointment, betrayal, confusion, cuss words in my journal, teardrops on the pillow... This hat has been to the mountains of promises fulfilled many times over, blessings bestowed on my undeserving life, the sewing and binding up of a wounded heart, extreme victories over captive, pet, and even non-conscious sins brought to the light. This hat is the real me. This is the hat that Christ himself gave me to wear. The other hats I chose to wear. This hat I chose, but it was also chosen for me in some weird, predestined, theological, way that I can't explain. There's this balance between laying your whole life down and giving up everything, but at the same time taking up something that's being freely given and placing it on your head and the only reason you are wearing it is because Christ chose to put it right there in your path. Christ predestined my path and where it would lead and he placed that hat there for me to find, and there in the slum of life, in the dirt of a twisted trail, I desperately gave up everything (just like I do to this very day), and I chose to place that hat on my head. I choose this hat everyday, but it also chose me. And it's white....Good thing.

Day 4 of Thanksgiving ~ Thankful for 'Maids'

Thankful for 'Maids' Proverbs 31: 13-15 I'm probably not the first woman to read Proverbs 31 and say, "Well, she had servants and that's how she got all that work done". It's true that many biblical women had maid-servants and the woman portrayed in Proverbs 31 was of high social position, but what many people might not realize, is that Proverbs 31 may be describing more than one woman. The Life Application Bible states "that she may be a composite portrait of ideal womanhood". None of us can do everything listed in Proverbs 31. For instance, I enjoy writing and organizing (two things not directly stated in Proverbs 31), but I am not a good seamstress, nor can I knit. I think a good premise to stand on, is the belief that we become Proverbs 31 women, when we do the best we can with our time, talents, and the gifts that God gives us. The verses I want to take a look at seem very ordinary, but if you stop to put a modern spin on them, you will see that you work just as hard as she does and you have a lot to be thankful for. Here is a very small portion of Proverbs 31 to look at: "She looks for wool and flax and works with her hands in delight. She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar. She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens." (Proverbs 31:13-15 NASB) Have you ever been clothes shopping with your children? It's insane. Just as this woman looked for wool and flax to make yarn with, we get everyone ready to go (just this in itself can be crazy), get through traffic, change a diaper, nurse an infant, head into the store, try to find stuff on sale (that's never on sale, on the day that you're there), find the correct sizes, deal with boys hiding in clothes racks and groaning in the bra section, take the potty-training toddler to the bathroom where he is afraid of the toilet and won't pee, wish your oldest child was old enough to babysit as you look longingly at the shoe and handbag racks but pass them as quickly as possible to avoid temptation, checkout and usually spend more than you wanted to (but your heart was good and in the right place; it just didn't work out), head home completely exhausted, and realize that what used to be fun is seriously A LOT of work, now! But if you think about it, we have modern-day servants (called vehicles, shopping carts, and conveyor belts) that make shopping much easier than in biblical times when they went to the market on a daily basis. This woman worked with her hands in delight. I love that phrase. It's one of my favorites in Proverbs 31. Do you do your laundry, dishes, and chores with delight? Because just like those women had maidservants in biblical times, so do we. They are called the washing machine, dryer, dishwasher, vacuum, etc. They make our lives easier. So while we may not have household servants making the workload easier, these modern day appliances are essentially, "extra hands", that we need to be thankful for. I don't always take delight in my household chores. I'm usually worried about the next thing that needs done. I'm writing this for myself, as much as anyone else. I want to work with my hands in delight, just like she did. This lady was compared to a ship who brought her food from afar. I definitely feel like I'm in a ship when I go grocery shopping. It is an all day affair for us, and then we usually have to do schoolwork along the way, and when we get home. It's another day that makes me exhausted but I'm thankful again that I have a vehicle that's big enough to enable me to only have to shop every two weeks. We have a refrigerator, as well, that enables us to go longer between shopping, than the Proverbs 31 lady, could. She rises while it is still night and prepares food for her household. If Proverbs 31 is about one woman, I doubt she had an infant that kept her up during the night, and if she did, most biblical women of high social status had nursemaids, which actually breastfed the babies. When I don't have a nursing baby I do get up while it's still night, and make breakfast, and pack lunches. Not all of us can do that, but I think in the heart of every woman is the desire to do so. Our motive and heart's desire is what God sees; not if we sleep while the toddler (who is normally up at 6am) and the infant sleep a little later than usual. The point of that statement in verse 15, I think, is that we not be lazy, but instead work diligently to provide for our household. We can thank God for the seasons when we are up a lot during the night, with babies. We can thank him for ANY sleep we do get, during these seasons. We can thank God and bless his name when we don't have any babies, we sleep more during the night, and we are able to get up earlier. How my heart longs for the days when I can return to my early mornings, again. I miss that time with my husband and with the Lord. The last sentence in verse 15 states that the Proverbs 31 woman gives portions to her maidens. We don't have any maidservants. Some of us have daughters but I would hate for you to view any of your children in this light. Children should help around the house; they are a vital part of any household that functions well, but never should they be seen as your servant. How can we view this last portion of the verse, in a modern yet biblical way, then? I'll tell you how I view it. You remember that our vehicle, our appliances, and our modern inventions are essentially 'extra hands'? They are almost like maids, for us. Thus, I think that providing care and stewardship for them, should be a part of any modern-day Proverbs 31 woman. We are called to steward all gifts from God wisely. We need to treat these gifts as if we are thankful for them. We can keep them clean, sparkling, and in good working order. We can budget for oil changes, car washes, filters, etc. We can teach our children to care about things and not destroy them. This, if anything, grows gratitude in children, for property of their own and others. I need some help in this area. I see going to the car wash as "driving in the rain"! If something has wheels or a motor, or both, I will find a way to ruin it. Thankfully, (and I am seriously thankful) I met and married an engine mechanic who can fix literally anything! :) At least God knows I am thankful for my husband, and that my motives are pure when it comes to things with motors. He knows I just lack sense. In conclusion, can you begin to see modern inventions comparable to biblical servants? Can you begin to be thankful for these "extra hands"? Nothing fosters this more, than doing without for awhile, which we have done a time or two. If you have never done without, try to imagine what it would be like. Today, let's be grateful for the modern things we take for granted! God bless!

~ Rachelle's Housecleaning Secrets ~

*Would anyone else care to share some of their housecleaning or time management secrets? Would you like to add anything to mine? You can be a working woman, a working mom, a homeschooling stay-at-home mom, a mother of preschoolers, a stay-at-home wife without kids or even someone who isn't married! I would love to hear from you! :) Just leave a comment(s). *




This summer I have pretty much been stuck at home. We don't have a lot of money left over for me to be driving around all over and when I drive around I end up spending money at thrift stores, yard sales or whatever. I am pretty much limited to church on Thursday and Sunday and grocery shopping twice a month.

So, this summer I have been doing a lot of cooking, cleaning and sorting. It's been nice to be able to sort and get rid of things on Freecycle, since we just moved here. I've been wanting to post a few housecleaning secrets on here. Sometimes housecleaning becomes too important to me, so I have to be careful. I also know that having a clean, comfortable and uncluttered home is a good thing, too...so...about 90% of the time my house is clean, picked up and running smoothly. I have a few secrets for all the people who ask me how I do it with three kids! :)

I remember working for a little while, while I was pregnant with Zane and I know it was harder to keep my house clean. We lived in this rickety house that was infested with mice. It was horrible and I was so glad when we moved out of it! That was the only time I think my home was gross...

When I lived in the camper for 18 months I kept it really clean, too, though it was hard. I had to de-clutter every month and I had to clean twice as much (or more) as I would have had to do had I been in a normal home. It was concentrated mess! :) I sweep once a week here, whereas in the camper I swept twice a day. Living in the camper with three children showed me that I can live in any size home and run that home, smoothly. So, here are some of my secrets for keeping a clean, uncluttered home:

1) PICKING UP THE HOUSE: My biggest secret, is really something very simple indeed! The kids and I pick-up (not to be mistaken with clean ) the house every night before bed. The whole house must be picked up before bed, including the yard. Why is this my biggest secret? The reason is because, in the morning I can clean. I don't have to deal with the discouragement of having to pick up messes, so I CAN clean! :) I get up and I can vacuum after breakfast. I can even vacuum the kids rooms if I beat them in there, before they start playing. There is nothing better than waking up to a picked up house every morning! :) There is also nothing better than being able to go out and mow grass in the morning and not have to waste my time and energy picking up toys in the yard. This is my biggest time-management tip, ever, I think!

2) CHILDREN: Kids MUST clean up their own mess. My kids have been trained to clean since they could walk and now it doesn't take them long to get it done. I have a bit of trouble with Sheldon. He knows how to do it, but thinks since he's little he can get away with playing, while the others clean. I have watched him clean, though, and I know I trained him well, (and the same as the other children) because he knows where everything goes. Every so often (maybe once every two months) I go through the toy boxes and containers and put misplaced objects in the right places. Usually things get put away in the wrong places when kids come over to play and don't know where things go. I must say that organizing the kids toys has helped them immensely to get their cleaning done quickly. For a very long time I would keep large diaper boxes and certain toys would go in certain boxes. You can line them up in closets or along a wall. It's best if they are in a closet because they don't look very pretty. If you can afford to buy organizing boxes that would be nicest (I finally do have some, now). Anyway, trains in one, Barbies in another, baby dolls in one, doll clothing in another, army men in one, cars in another, etc....you get the picture. We have one toy box for misc toys. We have one larger toybox for all manner of swords, indoor balls, very large trucks and construction trucks, play guns, etc. What I am getting at though is that EVERY toy needs to have a place. It doesn't take long to teach a child where they all go. My kids have come to me before with a piece of trash to throw away or a new toy without a home, and told me they didn't know where to put it. This works very well! I rarely clean up my kids messes. If they want to watch a movie they have to clean the livingroom, or if they have made a huge mess elsewhere they have to clean it up, before they can watch a movie! NO slumming allowed!!! I don't know why it bothers me so much when they watch a movie and they are surrounded by their mess. I can't stand to watch a movie amisdt my own mess, either. Anyway, they know the rules about movie watching. My house usually has toys scattered all over it, all day long. It doesn't bother me; as long as they are cleaned up before bed.

3) CLUTTER: I think we all know that clutter is the biggest enemy, when it comes to keeping a clean home. The reason is because you have to move it, to clean, and it wastes so much precious time and energy. Mail needs to be sorted daily....open it...throw envelopes and flyers away...file the statement...put the bill portion and sending envelope wherever you keep your bills...and throw out the junk mail. Or recycle it. Join Freecycle.org to get rid of larger items or just take them to the Goodwill. I took so much stuff to the Goodwill when we first moved here, and got rid of an old washer, and two tv's on Freecycle. Don't make piles! I have one designated area for pile-making. I puts odds and ends, papers, lists, etc, on one place on my island and before bed I try to sort the pile. You could also use a basket. Having a designated area for your pile works really well. A lot of the clutter I have seen in people's houses is trash, plain and simple. Just throw it away as soon as it becomes trash! :) Get after your kids BIG TIME for leaving candy wrappers or whatever somewhere other than the trash.... If you don't, they won't learn to throw things away. If you have major issues with clutter, a good website is: www.flylady.net I've never had to use this, per-say, but I like what she has to say on there, and she has good steps to take! :)

4) MEAL CLEAN-UP: Somehow, I got into the habit of cleaning as I cook/bake. After I am done, it doesn't look like I even made anything! :) There are just dishes in the sink to load in the dishwasher. Some people are REALLY good and load the dishwasher as they cook, but I'm not that good!
My dishrag is my best friend, ever. I use two a day usually, cleaning up my kitchen as I cook.

5) LISTS AND SCHEDULES: If it helps you, make a cleaning schedule for the days of the week. Such as: Mon:bathrooms, Tues: Vacuuming, Wed: Dusting or Windows (I've found that these need done every two or three weeks and so I alternate them, accordingly ), Thurs: Mopping, Fri: Mowing/yardwork/clean Garage, or whatever your unique needs are. Do dishes, laundry, picking up the house, bedmaking, etc, everyday. Make a list of things you can do monthly and bi-monthly, and every so often pick one of them to do. Some of the ones on mine are: Washing all the sheets, Vacuuming the car out, washing walls (if you have any that need it), my husband's shower, organize the Tupperware cabinet, organize the bathroom cabinets/ drawers, Refrigerator/freezer, wash doors and doorways. I also have a yearly list that contains: mini Blinds, window frames inside and out, clean behind stove, fridge and washer and dryer, etc. You will have specific things that are unique to you. My summer house cleaning list is different than my winter list. No gardening or yardwork. A daily list helps, too! :)

6) LAUNDRY: Do all your laundry everyday. I do one or two loads a day and that's it. I wash it, dry it and fold it. I fold it right out of the dryer and set the piles on the washer and dryer. I leave the piles there (usually three days at the most) until I have enough to put them away. I hate putting away laundry so this is a way I can skip out on it. Plus, the piles are not in the way of anything. They would be in the way if I folded on my bed or on my couch, which is what I used to do. I would end up moving the piles to the dressers or wherever and I wouldn't put the clothes away. By putting them on my washer and dryer, I can go for three days without having to put them away, but also not having them in the way. You can sometimes find loop-holes for your procrastination! :) This is one of mine! I have a rack above my washer and dryer with hangers on it for shirts, too, which I would never use if I folded on the couch. So, I get to use them now, since I fold in the laundry room! :)

7) MORNING ROUTINES: I get up with my husband, pack his lunch, eat a snack, read my bible and work out, check my email, and go back to bed (usually). When I get up the second time, I make my bed, gather laundry from every room and put a load in. I eat breakfast, shower if it's hot, and start my daily cleaning. The rest of the day I have free, pretty much, except for meals and dishes. My kids have to make their own beds, too. When school is in (we homeschool), I still have the same morning routine, and that free time I would have had is when we do school. Your situation will be different from mine. Some days if it's busy I stay up in the morning after my husband leaves and sometimes I don't. During school time, I won't be doing that. In fact, I may have to start getting the kids up earlier.

8) CLEANING SUPPLIES: Why clutter up your shelves and under your sinks with things you use to clean with??? That doesn't make sense! As a stay at home mom and an Army wife, I can't really afford to buy all the latest cleaning innovations, but my house is still clean! I have found a few products that I really like. I have ONE (I repeat ONE) shelf that has cleaning supplies on it and none under any of my sinks besides dish soap and automatic dishwasher detergent. My favorite is Windex Multi-surface. I use a bottle of it every month, on every surface. My other favorite is Mr Clean Magic Erasers for walls, crayon, and smudges. The only other cleaning supplies I have are: Scrubbing Bubbles (we have hard water, otherwise I wouldn't use it, but I need it for the tubs and sinks), a bleach based cleaning spray which I use on many surfaces (I actually use the Walmart brand Great Value), bleach for doing the white laundry, concentrated Carpet Cleaning solution, Murphey's Oil Soap for cleaning my linolium floors and Comet for cleaning toilets. And that's it! If you don't have an oven with an automatic cleaning cycle you would need oven cleaner, also. But why collect all kinds of cleaning supplies when you only need basic things. All the things I listed besides the carpet cleaning solution, I use for multiple things. Take Murphey's Oil Soap. It is CHEAP and concentrated and I use it to dust, clean floors and polish furniture. Minimize the clutter but get the job done nicely! :)

9) TRACKING: Dirt gets in from animals, kids, adults, the breeze, etc. I think we all know that taking shoes off helps, but i go farther in the summer. The kids don't come in unless they have washed their feet off at the spicket. I have big beachtowels on the floor at each doorway (and we have 4 doorways) and the kids wipe their wet feet on that before they go on the carpet. When the dog runs in the house (which is ALL day long) he ends up wiping his feet on the towels as he runs in. It really helps. It looks stupid to have these beach towels all over but it really works, so I don't care! If you care about color coordinating, you could buy towels to match the decor. I use towels rather than rugs because they are easier to pick up and wash because I wash them every week.

10) PRAYER: I pray that I will do in the day, what God would have me do...HIS agenda. Not mine. God wants our homes to be comfortable, not stressful, overwhelming and depressing. At the same time, He also wants us to be nurturing our children. Spending time with them in the best ways possible. We need to be making healthy meals for our husbands and ministering to them at the end of the day. I wouldn't have the energy if I worked like a mad woman all day long. Neither would I be able to function and enjoy life with a house that looks like a tornado went through it. There is a BALANCE!

No excuses, no blaming it on the kids or lack of space (we have a big house now, but we have also lived in camper, so none of you have an excuse!). No blaming it on your husband, too much yardwork, not enough money, not enough storage space, not enough time, not enough organizational skills, or whatever it is. You can do it! :)

Anybody want to add to this???