Valentines Day All Month ~ Day 8 ~ Irreconcilably Different?

Valentines Day All Month ~ Day 8 ~ Irreconcilably Different? You marry three people, they say: the person you think they are, the person they really are, and the person they become because they married you. That is so opposite of what we think when we are young and in love. We think about the common interests we have. We think about how compatible we are. We overlook things we shouldn't overlook. We don't even see red flags. It's like we are color-blind. But maybe that's how God plans it, when he writes stories. God can work around it, and makes something beautiful from the messiness of two people who become one flesh. I think he can make something beautiful from two people who are vastly different (or become vastly different as time goes on), and realize a little late, that they are incompatible. My husband and I are as incompatible as water and oil. Trust me; we took the compatibility tests. I think most couples are this way for awhile, even if it's just for a season. No differences are really irreconcilable, and if you believe so, you are not trusting God to make the changes in you and in your spouse, to put you on the same page, together. The book of Ephesians has the best description of how God breaks down barriers and differences in people and unites them. Chapter two in Ephesians can give a struggling marriage much hope for unity and new life, and it is a passage much marked and cherished in my Bible. "Therefore remember that formerly you, the Gentiles in the flesh, who are called "Uncircumcision" by the so-called "Circumcision," which is performed in the flesh by human hands- remember that you were at that time separate from Christ, excluded from the commonwealth of Israel, and strangers to the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who formerly were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For He Himself is our peace, who made both groups into one and broke down the barrier of the dividing wall, by abolishing in His flesh the enmity, which is the Law of commandments contained in ordinances, so that in Himself He might make the two into one new man, thus establishing peace, and might reconcile them both in one body to God through the cross, by it having put to death the enmity. And He came and preached peace to you who were far away, and peace to those who were near; for through Him we both have our access in one Spirit to the Father. So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints, and are of God's household, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus Himself being the corner stone, in whom the whole building, being fitted together, is growing into a holy temple in the Lord, in whom you also are being built together into a dwelling of God in the Spirit. (Ephesians 2:11-22 NASB) So you see, two people who are different (and will be until they die) can become unified in purpose, through Christ, building upon the foundation laid by the apostles and prophets and held up by the Cornerstone, Christ Jesus. If there is an unequal yoking, it may take time, trial, and much prayer and patience on your part, for your spouse to come to the Lord, in repentance. If there is much pain from the past, scripture says that the Lord is the Great Physician. Scripture also says that there is a time for everything...a time to mourn and weep, included. Eventually, God makes all things beautiful in his perfect timing, and we must believe that. If there is much shame from the past, scripture says that we are new creations in Christ and that there is no condemnation in Him. Every thought must be taken captive to the obedience of Christ and serious steps taken to avoid the pitfalls of whatever sin has caused the shame. There is a time to tear down and there is a time to rebuild, and sometimes marriages which have what seems to be irreconcilable differences, must go through a process of tearing down walls, barriers, and sin which have creeped into the relationship. Small cracks which happened so slowly that they were unnoticeable, oftentimes give Satan a foothold. When this happens, many marriages have to start over and rebuild from the, hopefully, new and solid foundation of Christ alone and whatever "good" is left in the marriage. In repentance and rest, and quietness of soul and in trust, there is oftentimes salvation for the marriage (Isaiah 30:15). If one spouse is stiff-necked and unrepentant, even then it is not hopeless, and I would say to you, to keep pressing on. Nothing is irreconcilable with God. And unless there is danger in the marriage relationship, or continual behaviors which are repeated with no remorse or repentance, than I would suggest to you, to remove the word divorce from your vocabulary....for nothing is impossible with God! http://youtu.be/bpphtclh7Ko You marry three people, they say: the person you think they are, the person they really are, and the person they become because they married you. That is so opposite of what we think when we are young and in love. We think about the common interests we have. We think about how compatible we are. We overlook things we shouldn't overlook. We don't even see red flags. It's like we are color-blind. But maybe that's how God plans it, when he writes stories. God can work around it, and makes something beautiful from the messiness of two people who become one flesh. I think he can make something beautiful from two people who are vastly different (or become vastly different as time goes on), and realize a little late, that they are incompatible. My husband and I are as incompatible as water and oil. Trust me; we took the compatibility tests. I think most couples are this way for awhile, even if it's just for a season. No differences are really irreconcilable, and if you believe so, you are not trusting God to make the changes in you and in your spouse, to put you on the same page, together. The book of Ephesians has the best description of how God breaks down barriers and differences in people and unites them. Chapter two in Ephesians can give a struggling marriage much hope for unity and new life, and it is a passage much marked and cherished in my Bible. "Therefore remember that formerly you, the Gentiles in the flesh, who are called "Uncircumcision" by the so-called "Circumcision," which is performed in the flesh by human hands- remember that you were at that time separate from Christ, excluded from the commonwealth of Israel, and strangers to the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who formerly were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For He Himself is our peace, who made both groups into one and broke down the barrier of the dividing wall, by abolishing in His flesh the enmity, which is the Law of commandments contained in ordinances, so that in Himself He might make the two into one new man, thus establishing peace, and might reconcile them both in one body to God through the cross, by it having put to death the enmity. And He came and preached peace to you who were far away, and peace to those who were near; for through Him we both have our access in one Spirit to the Father. So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints, and are of God's household, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus Himself being the corner stone, in whom the whole building, being fitted together, is growing into a holy temple in the Lord, in whom you also are being built together into a dwelling of God in the Spirit. (Ephesians 2:11-22 NASB) So you see, two people who are different (and will be until they die) can become unified in purpose, through Christ, building upon the foundation laid by the apostles and prophets and held up by the Cornerstone, Christ Jesus. If there is an unequal yoking, it may take time, trial, and much prayer and patience on your part, for your spouse to come to the Lord, in repentance. If there is much pain from the past, scripture says that the Lord is the Great Physician. Scripture also says that there is a time for everything...a time to mourn and weep, included. Eventually, God makes all things beautiful in his perfect timing, and we must believe that. If there is much shame from the past, scripture says that we are new creations in Christ and that there is no condemnation in Him. Every thought must be taken captive to the obedience of Christ and serious steps taken to avoid the pitfalls of whatever sin has caused the shame. There is a time to tear down and there is a time to rebuild, and sometimes marriages which have what seems to be irreconcilable differences, must go through a process of tearing down walls, barriers, and sin which have creeped into the relationship. Small cracks which happened so slowly that they were unnoticeable, oftentimes give Satan a foothold. When this happens, many marriages have to start over and rebuild from the, hopefully, new and solid foundation of Christ alone and whatever "good" is left in the marriage. In repentance and rest, and quietness of soul and in trust, there is oftentimes salvation for the marriage (Isaiah 30:15). If one spouse is stiff-necked and unrepentant, even then it is not hopeless, and I would say to you, to keep pressing on. Nothing is irreconcilable with God. And unless there is danger in the marriage relationship, or continual behaviors which are repeated with no remorse or repentance, than I would suggest to you, to remove the word divorce from your vocabulary....for nothing is impossible with God! http://youtu.be/bpphtclh7Ko