Gentleness ~ 2009

My italics didn't copy and paste, unfortunately....so hopefully you guys can understand this....there were parts of it that I wanted to be in italics....

FRUITS OF THE SPIRIT
2009

This year, for my fruit of the Spirit, I am studying Gentleness. What does it truly mean to be gentle....what does the actual word mean and how do I apply it in my daily life as a wife and mother? These are the beginning questions I ask each January in reference to my favorite Bible verse of all time...Galatians 5:22-25. Armed with my dictionary and at least three different Bible translations, I take time each January to study a particular Fruit, for that year. This is my 8th year doing this! This is the first time I have ever written my study out for my live-journal and blog, though!

In 2002, I studied love. I made it through a very difficult time, waiting for my fiancé and the love of my life to graduate Basic Training and AIT. We began our life together, and the fruit of our love brought the joy of new life! A strawberry represents this year...red and sweet for new love! :)
In 2003, I studied Joy. Our first child was born in 2003. A pear represents this year, for “round with child.” LOL!
In 2004, I studied Peace. I miscarried this year, and was taught to have peace in all situations and to be peaceful and bring peace to our home. Oranges (my favorite fruit) bring me peace (if they are good ones), so that represents this year.
In 2005, I studied patience. I had Abigail in 2005 and everyone knows how trying it can be to adjust to having a second child, and I definitely needed patience that year! I think an Avocado will go perfect for that year....since I craved it while pregnant with Abbie!
In 2006 I studied Kindness. We were wrapped heavily up in a family business deal, and I will admit, that I tried to be kind to everyone involved but I failed in becoming more kind, that year. A tomato can represent that year because everywhere I turned, I felt I was being bombarded by flying, rotten tomatoes! The joy of doing the Fruits of the Spirit each year, is that when you are done with them, you can wrap around and do them all over again, thank heavens.
In 2007, I studied Goodness and failed yet again at being a good wife and mother. Though our situation was awful, our marriage going down-hill, and my faith being tested, I cannot excuse myself for my behavior in regards to all that happened that year, and look forward to working on that particular one again, and digging deeper the next time. An un-ripe and bitter Kiwi, will represent 2007, because that is what I was...Bitter and green with envy of others who had it better than I did...
In 2008, I studied Faithfulness. Was I full of faith in my Heavenly Father? At the beginning of 2008 it seemed like just a repeat of 2007, in regards to our situation. I will admit, I had no hope that my life would ever be the same again. But I studied that word, anyway, and things made a definite change for the better in March 2008. An Apple can represent 2008, for I became the Apple of my husband’s eye, again, and he, mine!
So here we are arriving at Gentleness for 2009, and here is my study! I don’t know what fruit I will use to represent it, yet, though! Enjoy!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


A few days after I sat down to do my study, my poor husband and I got into a nice argument over the phone and I thought to myself, “Yes, I will be challenged this year.” The devil never fails to try to get me to do the exact opposite of my fruit, for that year! Sometimes he fails and sometimes he succeeds. I want to write this study in conversation format, because I talked a lot to God and myself while I was doing it, and I think it will be interesting, for you all. Anything appearing in italics, will be my conversing with God!

I start out by asking a few questions like the ones I wrote in the first paragraph. This gets my mind moving, and gearing up for my study! I take this whole thing VERY seriously if you can’t tell, already! :) Next, I do a word study, and some sub-word studies, which I always find intriguing. Throughout the year, I make it a matter of prayer, and try to keep it in mind and think of it daily. I sometimes write out verses pertaining to that particular Fruit, on my calender. Each month will usually have one verse. This is not to memorize...it is just so that I see it, and it reminds me to think on it. Then at the end of the year, I write about what I have learned, how I did, how I could have done better, etc. I encourage you all to do this! It is a lot of fun! Thanks go to Roberta Dahlin, for sharing the idea with me in 2002! She has done it with me most years, since! Where she got the idea, I don’t know! Here is the verse:

Galatians 5:22-25
“But the Fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.”

Fruits of the Spirit, are the virtues that God prunes and manicures in us. Without them, others do not see Christ resident within us. Where there is no growth and good fruit, you might question whether or not you are really saved. Jesus speaks in His Word multiply times about fruit, trees, etc. Bad trees produce bad fruit. Good trees produce good fruit. It is just logical. But, you cannot do the growing on your own! You must ask God to help you and then meet Him halfway.

In the verse above, it says “Against such things there is no law”...if you don’t understand what that means, this is what it says below the line in my husband’s study Bible:

“ Christian character is produced by the Holy Spirit, not by the mere moral discipline of trying to live by law. Paul makes it clear that justification (that is the act, process, or state of being right with God) by faith does not result in libertinism (that is a free-thinker especially in religious matters) The indwelling Holy Spirit produces virtues in the believer’s life.” I do believe however, that you can make it very hard on yourself, by not allowing the Holy Spirit to do these things in your life....by simply not thinking about it, and by simply not getting serious about growth!

So, now we begin on the word study....what does it truly mean to be gentle?

Definitions:

GENTLENESS: The quality or state of being gentle, (yes, but what does it mean to “be” it?), especially mildness of manners and disposition.
GENTLE: Belonging to a family of high social station (well, I am ruled out here), chivalrous ( a male trait, or so I think), honorable, distinguished, of or relating to a gentleman, kind, amiable, tractable, docile (hmmm...), free from harshness, sterness (Lord, this will be challenging, won’t it?), or violence, soft, delicate, moderate.
GENTLEMAN: A man of noble or gentle birth, a man who combines gentle birth with chivalrous qualities, a man who’s conduct conforms to a high standard of propriety or correct behavior.
GENTLEWOMAN: A woman of noble or gentle birth. A woman of refined manners or good breeding.

Sub-word Definitions, chosen from the actual definitions:

CHIVALROUS: (yes, I was at the time, not wanting to focus much on myself and was thinking of Mr. Darcy and men in general, so this was the first sub-word I looked up! ) Valiant, marked by honor, generosity, and courtesy. Marked by gracious courtesy and high-minded consideration, especially to women.
MILDNESS: Gentle in nature and behavior. Not being or involving what is extreme, not severe, temperate (What does that mean?), comparatively soft, and easily worked, malleable.
AMIABLE: Pleasing, admirable, generally agreeable (yes, Lord, this I need work in), being friendly, sociable and congenial.
Amiable implies having qualities that make one liked and easy to deal with (*raises eyebrow*), good-natured, obliging, and complaisant.
MODERATE: Avoiding extremes of behavior or expression (*grits teeth*), observing reasonable limits, calm, temperate.
HARSHNESS: irritating ( I am definitely guilty of this, or so my husband says, sometimes), severe, lacking in refinement, crude.
NOBLE: Possessing outstanding qualities, very good, or excellent, grand or impressive, lofty.
TEMPERATE: Marked by moderation, keeping or held within limits, not extreme or excessive, mild, restrained (ouch, Lord this applies to my tongue, I know it does...).
DOCILE: Now...I think we all think docile to mean quiet, and subdued, maybe, but the definition is so much richer and I was glad to have looked it up, instead of over-looking it, because I think it really spoke to me! Easily taught (*sigh*), easily led or managed (double ouch....I know this is probably talking mostly about animals, but Lord, it is so hard to be led by the authority you have placed me under. When I let my husband lead, sometimes it gets hard....and I know it is worth it in the end, because we grow and learn, but I am forever scared to put myself under the headship of a mere man, even when I know it is Biblical, and right. Help me to have faith in your purposes....), obedient, tractable.
SOFT: This definition is another that was so much richer than I thought it would be! And men.....you are NOT excluded in this one....it is part of being a gentlemen, so read up! Pleasing or agreeable to the senses, subdued, quiet in pitch or volume (hmm....no yelling this year....), not violent, marked by a gentleness, kindness, or tenderness, engaging, kind, based on a negotiation and conciliation rather than on a show of power or threats (hmm...interesting), unassuming (ugh, I am always assuming the worst of everything), low-key, of a consistency that may be SHAPED or MOLDED, capable of being spread, occurring at such a speed and under such circumstances as to avoid destructive impact (this is talking about landing spaceships and aircraft, but how applicable in the grind of daily life! ).
MALLEABLE: Capable of being ALTERED, or controlled by outside forces or influences. Having the capacity for adaptive change (this can be looked at from two angles...you can be influenced for the good, or influenced for the bad....you pick....and your hormones and emotions WILL influence you for the bad!).

Very interesting! Good definitions, and much to think about and ponder throughout this year! Now here are the life-giving verses from God’s Holy and Fully-Inspired Word:

~Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
~Ephesians 4: 2-3 Be completely humble, and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love, make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit, through the bond of peace.
~ Philippians 4: 4-5 Rejoice in the Lord always and again, I say rejoice. Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near!
~ Colossians 3: 12-14 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And above al these virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
~1 Timothy 6 :11 Paul to Timothy But you man of God, flee from all this and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness.
~1 Peter 3:4 Peter speaking to women Instead it (your beauty) should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
~ Titus 3:1-2 Paul to Titus Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate (gentle in the KJV), and to show true humility toward all men.
~ Matthew 11:29 The words of our Savior, in red-letters: Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will FIND REST for your souls!

In my daily Bible reading I came across this passage and wanted to add it to the end of my study:

Luke 13: 6-8

Then he (Jesus) told this parable: “ A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So, he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, ‘For three years now I’ve been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven’t found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?’
“‘ Sir, the man replied, leave it alone for one more year, and I’ll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.”

Below the line it says this:

In the Old Testament, a fruitful tree was often used as a symbol of Godly living. Jesus pointed out what would happen to the other kind of tree- the kind that took valuable time and space and still produced nothing for the patient Gardener. This was one way Jesus warned his listeners that God would not tolerate forever their lack of productivity. Have you been enjoying God’s special treatment without giving anything in return? If so, respond to the Gardener’s patient care, and begin to bear the fruit God has created you to produce.

~ HE WHO HAS EARS, LET HIM HEAR ~